It is 12:17pm, I am sitting in the newsroom – Room 316 at the DSB Fowlow building of College of the North Atlantic. I am playing some songs on Grooveshark while I start this entry for the third time. They have taken a different form each time.
The first entry I tried to write was growing up. It was an inspiration that came to me last night while at Clancy’s. That pub used to be my home away from home, and last night it felt so foreign to me, like I was no longer welcome there. The best way to describe the feeling is imagine if your parents sold the house you grew up in and there were new residents living there. You go to visit the house. Everything basically looks the same with a few minor changes, but there’s just no more feeling of comfort there. It’s not your home anymore. That’s my feeling last night and that I have been getting for the last couple of outings to the pub. I tried writing an entry about how things change and no matter how much you cling to them, you can’t stop it.
There is a problem, beyond that little blurb I just wrote about the entry I ended up being completely brain-dead and was not able to keep writing. I ran into writers block. So I trashed it… hopefully one day to return to the topic and get an entry up later.
Entry attempt number 2, was going to be called “Never Enough”. It was inspired by an entry I saw in the Ice Like Diamonds blog. I haven’t checked it lately, and the frequent updates on her Facebook about how great her boyfriend is was starting to get to me so I have her hidden on my news feed now so I don’t automatically see it when she makes an entry. However, I did spot an entry about how her current beau is everything she could imagine, and I started falling back into my thought process about relationships. I realized that it seems like no one is ever enough for me. I was writing an entry about how society actually favors the mentality of “you’re too young to be tied down”. How the world we live in actually encourages young people to be promiscuous… it started with an explanation of how I always believed myself immune to that thought process, but how wrong it seems I have been.
I think that mentally my subconscious adopted that way of thinking, it just didn’t bother telling to the rest of my mind. It’s like my waking mind wanted nothing else but to settle down with someone and be happy, but the background thought process wouldn’t allow that.
Alas, I couldn’t finish the entry. Writer’s block struck again.
There are techniques that one can implement to help getting past writers block, but the one I find the most effective is simply, just to write. So Albeit neither of those entries will be written today, it is important that this one is completed. Hopefully this forced-out piece of literature is enough to unclog the mental gears and allow me to return to some kind of creative flow.
We shall see.